


Hear me, hear me now

by Herbasia



Category: How to Train Your Dragon (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Depression, F/M, Family Feels, Happy Ending, Headcanon, Panic Attacks, Post-How to Train Your Dragon 2, Slow Burn, Smut, Tears
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-14
Updated: 2021-02-21
Packaged: 2021-03-15 21:48:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29442876
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Herbasia/pseuds/Herbasia
Summary: Each word paled in the face of death...
Relationships: Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III & Astrid Hofferson, Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III & Toothless, Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III & Valka, Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III/Astrid Hofferson
Comments: 3
Kudos: 14





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> **AN: The whole plot is based on the lyrics of the song _When we were kids_ by Walking on Cars.**
> 
> English is not my first language. I'm still learning. Please, be understanting :)
> 
> This story is very important for me. I'm writing this fanfiction in polish, and publishing it on Wattpad, and I'm decided published it here. The story will have a several chapters. 
> 
> This story is very... difficult, soooo, get your handkerchiefs ready.

_It was better when we were kids  
No money, so rich  
Take me back to a memory  
To the water under the bridge_

*******

Astrid had never seen Berk so damaged before; ice shards, debris, wood, and pieces of metal scattered on the ground. The sight was especially terrifying now at dusk; a few huts were completely destroyed, and a great glacier cast a shadow over the village. The girl was walking towards Hiccup's house. A hood was thrown over her head to protect her from the freezing wind.

She sighed as she faced her beloved's hut.

There was no one around. For a moment she couldn't move; she was afraid of what would see inside. She was afraid that she would not be able to bear the sight of him suffering.

Astrid lost her leader, but Hiccup... Lost his father.

Finally she dared and opened the door without knocking. She knew he was inside. As she was walking towards him, she met Valka, who was sitting on the steps of the Great Hall, talking to Gobber. Astrid didn't know her, but she could see sadness and motherly concern in the woman's eyes; so she promised her that she would try to talk to Hiccup.

Young Haddock holed himself up in solitude shortly after being appointed chief; he didn't want to talk to anyone; he even left his own dragon in the stable. The enemy was defeated, the dragons and humans were safe, and the adrenaline slowly began to leave his body. Hiccup was weakening, he was extremely tired and overwhelmed. He felt like he was in a trance - so many new, not necessarily good things happened in the space of several dozen hours.

It was unusually dark in his room; the only light was provided by the lantern on the desk. Hiccup was sitting on his bed; beads of sweat began to form on his bare chest. Strong shivers ran through the boy's body; he was nervous, panicked, and still dazed. He rubbed his exhausted face with a trembling hand; his eyes were swollen from crying and lack of sleep. He tried to sleep, but his body and mind rebelled. He could still see the pictures from a few hours ago; he could still hear the screams, roars of dragons; he could still smell blood and tears and cold.

He wasn't even crying anymore. He just tried to breathe slowly and steadily.

“Hiccup?” 

He was so focused on his breathing that he didn't notice the presence fiancée in the room.

“Astrid, what are you doing here?” He turned to her, looking up towards the door.

“I'm worried about you,” she answered truthfully. The girl approached him carefully. She swallowed loudly as she noticed how he despared he was. “Honey...”

His hair was disheveled; his boyish features were sharper, as if he were gritting his teeth all the time. Astrid took off her fur hood and sat down next to him. She saw how tightly his hands were clenched on the bed frame.

“I couldn't leave you alone,” she stroked his hand; this gesture relaxed him slightly, as if the touch of his beloved was little releasing the whole tension. “I can't fall asleep thinking you're alone here.”

Hiccup hadn't looked at her; he was still calming down from the panic attack he went through. He was relieved in his heart that Astrid had come to him. Yes, he needed peace and solitude, but her presence was something... different.

The blonde was constantly watching her fiancée; she watched him struggle bravely against the gloomy, depressing thoughts. She brushed his hair away from his sweaty forehead; she stroked his hot freckled cheek and tried to catch his gaze.

“This is all so fucked up, Astrid,” he whispered into the space between them. “I only had them together for a while. For just one brief moment we were all happy. We were family - me, mom and dad; just like I dreamed about it since I was a child. I saw their smiles, this love and joy. And in one moment, it was all gone,” he gasped. “One bastard, a heartless psychopath, took my family that I had just got back.”

Hiccup began to tremble anxiously; Astrid approached him and put her arm around him. She hooked her fingers into his arm muscles and pulled him tightly against her side.

“Babe, breathe,” she told him calmly. She could see that another panic attack was coming. “Slowly, take your time. I'm with you.”

The young man slowly surrendered to the soothing touch of his beloved. Her warm hands massaged his hunched, aching back, and warm breath caressed his ear. He rested his head on her breast; heard Astrid's heart was beating hard and rhythmically; he could feel her breathing, faster than usual but still regular. He imitated her, trying not to mad.

Astrid realized that there was a really difficult time ahead of them. Stoick's sudden death was a below-belt blow for her, let alone Hiccup. She knew her fiancé; she knew how sensitive he was and how much he could love. Especially his father.

The blonde watched his breathing steadily; she stroked his hair, wet with sweat, admired it’s color and softness. Hiccup said nothing, only inhaled his sweetheart's sweet scent and counted every sigh.

The position they were sitting in was not the most comfortable.

“Go to sleep, Hiccup,” she rubbed his arm. “I'll wait until you fall asleep.”

The girl knew how exhausted he was and that he needed rest. She wasn't here to talk with him one about what happened. It was too early for that. She just wanted to see him and touch and make sure he was safe and alive.

Hiccup shifted in her arms. He pulled away and looked at her. Astrid had never seen his eyes look that shade; dark and deep emerald; pale from the suffering and injustice of this world. His lips trembled as if he was trying to say something.

“Astrid,” he said finally; he took her small hand. “Don't go, please.”

The girl squeezed his trembling fingers and smiled sadly. Of course she stayed. She leaned over him and placed a short kiss on the man cheek; she felt the heat emanating from him.

The warrior stood up for a moment to take off her shoulder straps, shoes and skirt. They had slept together many times, so the girl was not shy in front of him. Hiccup straightened and looked at her with a little shyness; he was ashamed of asking Astrid to stay with him. He didn't want to be selfish, but he couldn't help how much he was need her now.

She was left in only a shirt and leggings; she sat down next to him again and gripped his chin so that he looked at her.

“Hiccup, I'm here for you. I will always be with you,” Astrid was very confident; her words were so sincere that the man was speechless.

She knew she wasn't likely to talk to him today; anyway, what would this conversation be about? She sighed in resignation, lowered her eyes and looked down at her hands. Only now did she notice that he was trembled. Suddenly she felt this familiar touch, the blissful warmth of his arms, which hugged the girl's tiny body tightly. Astrid ran her fingers over Hiccup's chest; she felt his muscles tense gently as he put her on his lap.

The man plunged his face into the hollow of the girl's neck; he could feel her sweet scent and closeness. He placed a few tiny kisses on her bare skin, making her shiver. As he caressed, he whispered something incomprehensible; it is as if he were talking to himself. Astrid hugged his neck; she clutched her fingers in the beloved's hair, one hand slid down on his back. Hiccup descended with kisses on her chin and cheek until he finally came close to the girl's mouth. He didn't put their lips together right away, he looked at her first.

Astrid watched his handsome face. She saw him raise his hand and slowly untangling her braids, then run his fingers through the blond strands.  
Hiccup loved her hair; their color, thickness, softness, smell and every twist of curls. He admired their beauty, loved to stroke, comb and admire them. Sometimes he would pull, rug in a hit of passion, when they were fucking.

“I need you, Astrid,” he whispered against her lips. His eyes were glazed with the excess of shed tears.

She was about to say something, reassure him that she was there for him, but she felt their lips join in a hot kiss. Hiccup was not passive; he had never kissed her like that before. He parted the woman's mouth with his own tongue and sucked her lower lip. Astrid groaned in surprise and delight. She hadn't expected such a move from him.

The man pulled her to him, continuing his caress. His heart was racing as adrenaline and excitement began to bubble through his veins. He wanted to make one move, one after which Astrid might reject him and leave him alone.

He took a chance.

She sighed, slightly shocked when she felt his hand under her shirt. Goose bumps appeared on naked skin. Hiccup, seeing that Astrid was not moving away, he kissed her harder and lifted the end of her clothes so that a moment later it was on the floor next to the bed.

The blonde let him kiss, touch, undress and caress her; she was enjoying it, but she was still worried about the condition of her fiancée. He had had a panic attack and weeping a moment ago, and now he was thirsty. Astrid felt he wanted her; he was unable to hide his erection and increased breath. The couple didn't wait until the wedding with sex. They wanted each other too much not to succumb to the temptation of physical pleasure and savoring their own bodies.

They both knew sex for love. Sex, where confessions of love were nothing compared to movements, gestures and touch.

However, they did not know the sex born of despair and anger. Whatever was driving Hiccup, it was as strong as his kisses and his hands on her body, which was getting hotter every second.

Astrid was breathing hard and she could see spots before her eyes. The desire for her lover was so strong that she couldn't move. She was slowly losing her head - she was indulging in him, allowing everything. Hiccup reached for the fastenings of her loincloth; he wanted to feel the soft skin of her breast in his own hands. The girl groaned as the material fallen.

Hiccup broke the kisses and took her gently in his arms; he whispered her name with tenderness and adoration, as if to assure Astrid that he had everything under control.

But was it true?

He laid her on the bed. Astrid's golden hair spilled on the pillows. Hiccup hung over her body, kissing every bit of her naked breasts; he adored her body, the heat and every little shiver. He had one thing in mind now - to please her; sex was his escape. He wanted to act, undress and caress his beloved woman.

Astrid twined her fingers in his hair as she felt him sucked on one of her nipples. She was so sensitive to his touch; she forgot for a moment what had happened today. She felt a cold sweat pour over her. She felt dizzy. 

He was out of control. He wasn't aware of what he was doing. They cannot use their bodies to forget. Because then the return to the brutal reality will hurt even more.

"Hiccup," she said loud; she wanted to break through the barrier he had built around herself. He didn't react. Astrid felt a characteristic tingling in the lower abdomen. “Hiccup!” she screamed and tugged his hair. He broke away from her, and their eyes met.

Astrid had only seen him drunk once in her life. It was just after his return from Edge, when Snotlout’s father was celebrating his birthday. Stoick gave his friend a feast and they feasted for the whole day and night. It was then that they reached for mead for the first time. They suffered a bit because Astrid had poisoned herself, and Hiccup was acting just like not him. He could barely stand on his feet, gibberish, but he was also incredibly attractive, charming and wild. Astrid will never forget how he kissed her passionately right outside her hut. A crazy, confident Hiccup whose eyes darkened with excitement and an excess of emotion.

He was like that now; he stared at his beloved and breathed heavily. He didn't say anything. He just ran his fingers over the soft skin of her belly, still staring at her.

“I need you,” he repeated. “I want you, Astrid. Like never before,” he leaned on a hand and hovered just above her face. The blonde inhaled sharply, never taking her gaze off his mouth. “Push me away and I'll stop.”

They lasted for a while, just looking at each other. Astrid could almost hear their hearts beating at a frantic pace. She raised a hand and stroked the cheek of her lover, which was marked with dried tear marks. She couldn't refuse him, she couldn't. Because desire itself began to rule.

Hiccup groaned as he felt his girlfriend wrap her legs around his hips. She pulled him close and pressed their lips together in a desperate kiss. When she was going to feel it, it was just that - fast, hard, real painfully.

Astrid turned off her thinking completely, focused on feeling; lust has taken control of a pair of lovers. The young man undressed her quickly, with skillful fingers getting rid of any unnecessary material that covered their skin and hindered their movements. Astrid moaned as Hiccup kissed her, licked her, and blew hot air over every sensitive spot. Haddock couldn't decide where to touch her, caress her and kiss her. He wanted to absorb her, he wanted to be one with her; like one ripped body.

Hiccup ran his fingers down the girl's bare thighs; Astrid sucked in a breath, fully aware of what was coming. She only wanted one thing - for him to finally enter her. The man's body trembled; he focused only on their common desire.

He lay down on her calmly, waited a moment, and then he entered her into it violently; without warning, as was his habit. He didn't kiss her, didn't cover her mouth, didn't suppress her moans; he let his loved one scream. He himself growled as he felt Astrid tighten on him.

“Baby,” he whispered. “I love you so much,” he pushed his hips. “So fucking very much,” he made another thrust. “You hear, honey?” he said in her ear; he was constantly moving.

Astrid only managed to nod; she did not expect he to be like that. So sharp and daring. But she knew it wasn't Hiccup as usual. The girl gave up completely. She allowed herself to feel the immense pleasure he was giving them. He was closer to her with every move, touching places she had no idea about.

“I love you, Astrid,” he put his hands on her hips and pressed her body against his even tighter; he kept his eyes on her face.

“Hiccup,” she wanted to answer, but felt her fingers touch her at the most sensitive spot on her body.

Hiccup felt like he was like in a race; he tried to make it to the finish line, he wanted to find solace, to be rewarded with their joint orgasm. He knew that they would not love each other for long, they could not. He couldn't. He could see his own goddess, but he could see pain as well. Images began to form in his head. He smelled smoke again; sex and smoke. He heard Astrid groan again; groans and screams of despair, pain and pleasure. All the sensations mixed with each other. And he wanted them to come; he wanted to feel for those few seconds that he was floating above everything that had happened to him.

He fell on her, laced their hands together. Astrid lifted her hips, helping him get to their joint end. The woman herself could not cope, the pleasure was too great, the movements of the beloved were too violent, and the atmosphere between them was too tense.

“I need you,” he whispered in her ear; slowly began to break his voice. “Don't leave me, please.”  
He grabbed her cheeks; the girl looked at him. The sight crushed her. Hiccup was crying, despair took over; pleasure and pain blended so much together that he could no longer separate it himself. His movements were deep, but slow, lazy.

"I will never leave you," she replied and wiped a tear from her lover's cheek.

Hiccup groaned violently and pressed his face against her neck. Astrid heard his grunts of satisfaction; she felt the man freeze and end inside her. The heat flooded her that hit her was so great that she tensed her own body and she has come.

She ran her fingers over his shaking back; she tried to catch her breath; come back to reality. She kissed his forehead and combed he soft hair.

“Babe?” she said. Hiccup was still shivering, but not for the pleasure - he was crying.

Astrid panicked a little, she couldn't get up. The blonde felt Hiccup's tears on her own skin; she heard his sobbing and his rapid heartbeat. It was too much for her; she couldn't do it; she felt like breaking into a million pieces.

Because her whole world suffered, and she couldn't bring him relief even with her body.

She held tighter him to her; she whispered and calmed down he. She wanted stay with him, because another panic attack was hitting him.

“Stay with me, stay, stay, stay, stay,” he repeated endlessly. “I don't want to lose you,” he cried; he lay on her and kissed her neck, lips, cheeks. “I won't survive the loss you. Never, never, never, never,” he cried again, sobbed; he shed tears on her naked breast.

Astrid was crying too. Despair bound them more than sex.

She let him talk and tremble and touch her. She told him how much she loved him, assured him that she would never leave him, and that she couldn't imagine the world without him.

But the words did not guarantee him peace.

Each word paled in the face of death.


	2. Another kiss

N _obody cared about what we did  
Another fight and another kiss  
But now it’s water under the bridge_

*******

He woke up.

He felt blissful seconds of peace.

And that false feeling that everything was fine. That everything was as it was - in its place.

Hiccup barely opened his sleepy eyes, swollen from crying and salty tears. His head was aching and heavy. The crowd of thoughts, feelings and events made themselves felt. Despite sleep, he did not feel well, let alone rested. At the slightest movement he felt a throb of pain in every muscle. He is body was tired and needed regeneration.

The bodily pain will pass. Form will come back, but his broken heart will never beat the same again.

The Haddock lay on its back, staring at the ceiling as if looking for clues to get up and live after what happened yesterday. After what happened to him. He ran a hand over his face; His skin was sticky with sweat and his hair was disheveled. Hiccup was covered with a thick blanket, and as he moved slightly, the young man realized he was wearing no clothes.

Suddenly he was struck by the vague memories of yesterday evening and night.

_Astrid._

He sat up abruptly and turned his head towards the window. His emerald eyes immediately caught the attention of the tiny figure of the woman who slept by his side. The blonde was covered with a fur, her legs tucked up, one hand was placed under the cheek, the other was held at her side. It was open, as if waiting for a lover's hug.

Hiccup studied her for a moment, watching her breathe carefully. He gently brushed the hair from her ruddy cheek. Astrid was so beautiful when she slept. The calm and gentle breath matched her girlish beauty. The young man leaned over her and brushed his lips against her forehead. When he was with her, he closed his eyes, feeling the tears of regret coming in on the first day. He did not want to cry, so he gritted his teeth and inhaled the sweet scent of his beloved. The ideal and love of his life.

He tried to collect his thoughts. He remembers every event of yesterday; all the words that came out of his mouth and the slightest movement he allowed himself.

The first thing he remembered was anger. But for whom? For the father to sacrifice himself? To himself that he hadn't done anything to protect him? Or the gods who let the Stoick go?

Then came panic, cry, and howl. Longing and misunderstanding. Why did life take away the happiness he had just regained?

Feeling the pointless rush of thoughts approaching, he raised his head and shook it just as if to break this painful process. After all, no one will answer the questions he asks. Nobody knew the answer.

Hiccup looked out the window. Day was slowly start on Berk; the sun was dimmed by dense clouds, which will probably turn into heavy rain during the day. The boy was somewhat surprised that he woke up so early; usually it was difficult for him to get out of bed at dawn. He preferred to lead a nocturnal lifestyle; he was more creative and inventive then.

He sighed looking around his dimly lit room.

_“Oh, Thor...”_

Their clothes, armor, and prosthesis were scattered over him. The state was in complete disarray and mess. There was an unburned candle on the desk that must have been smoldering until recently. In the corner were papers, rubbish, and open books that Hiccup had thrown around in a fit of anger last night. His room never looked as if the most terrible wind had come through the window.

Haddock shuddered as he remembered how he had acted last night. How could he be so out of control of himself? So irresponsible? He loved Astrid the most in the world, he always treated her with respect and tenderness, and yesterday he acted like an ordinary animal. He used her; or so he felt. As if he had done something wrong. The boy looked again at the performer of his beloved, who was sleeping peacefully by his side. He thought for a moment; hurt her? Did he say something gross to her? Has he crossed a border?

Although, if that were the case, she would not have stayed in bed with him.

He loved watching her sleep. He even smiled for a moment, feeling a pleasant rush of love. However, Hiccup needed to talk to her, explain everything to her, and find out if he had hurt her. Because if he had done anything to hurt her... Hiccup would never forgive herself.

The young man started to panic a little. He hated being ignorant and blinded; now he was the chief he led his people, he had to keep everything under control. However, it seems that yesterday he was not in control of himself. Nothing should tempt him to soothe his own suffering for a second in a bodily way.

He felt like he was getting hot. He groaned in despair and ran his fingers through his hair. He reached for a prosthetic leg, which he quickly put on. He had to get up and get dressed before Astrid wakes up.

Once he was fully dressed, he got off the bed quietly and started picking things off the floor. He reached for Astrid's clothes, which he carefully folded and placed on the chair. He placed the papers and books on the desk so that they would not be in the way. He acted, trying not to think too much, although sometimes his thoughts drifted away to tragic events.

He thought of what he wanted to say to his fiancée. They had to explain everything to each other, because yesterday they were much too badly hurt. Young people made love more than once, but never this way; never so boldly and aggressively. Hiccup really began to fear that he had hurt her physically. He wanted to kneel in front of her and check her body for any bruises or scratches. Astrid was his sacredness.

Impatiently, he went to the small window; he sneaked a peek through them, trying to reassess the damage. Now he could do it reasonably sober; his emotions were still lingering in him, but not as intensely as yesterday.

The village was asleep; no one has poked their nose out of their huts yet. I guess everyone was still resting after what had happened. All he noticed were the dragons rising into the sky from time to time or squawking happily.

Hiccup was the chief now. He should check if they are safe and that nobody is in danger. He had to endure too much suffering and pain. He promised himself that he would always be one step ahead of danger from now on. He was not sure how to do it yet, but he knew he was going to come up with something.

No one will ever be hurt again. No one will ever die again. Not as tragic as his father.

He clenched his fists and closed his eyes. His breathing quickened, his heart pounding in his chest. He rested his forehead against the window frame and tried to hold back the hopeless tears.

“Hiccup?” he felt Astrid's hand touch his shoulder.

He relaxed a bit because his fiancée unknowingly chased away his painful thoughts. He stood up straight and turned to her. She was covered with a blanket; her feet were bare, and her golden hair was messy. She had dark circles under her eyes and dry lips; she looked tired and scared. Hiccup swallowed. He hoped she was not afraid of him.

“All right?” she said, looking at him carefully again.

“Yes,” he lied, as they both knew. The blonde sighed and took his hand, approaching him a bit.

“Hiccup, I-,” she spoke softly, wanting to console him in some way.

“Wait,” he interrupted her and squeezed her hand.

Astrid nodded; she did not know what her fiancé tried told, but she waited patiently. Whatever he tells her, it will be important to her. She knew she could not let him shut up in herself. The conversation was the most important part of any relationship. It was the basis of love and friendship. She wanted to hear him tell her about his feelings, fears, worries; how he shares his problems and worries with her. How he cries on her shoulder and laments what he has lost. She wanted him to still feel the way he used to.

The events of the night before showed that Hiccup was truly in despair. His sensitivity and empathy could be felt from a distance. He was a good man, son, partner and now a leader. Yesterday, when they made love so desperately and chaotically, Astrid felt his pain all too much. She flinched at the memory of his tears on his bare skin.

“Astrid, this what happened between us yesterday,” he looked at the floor. “I don't remember everything exactly. Sorry, it should not be like that. I know that is not what you came to see me for. I feel that I used you. I was not thinking clearly... I was not thinking with my head,” he spoke so fast that Astrid couldn't told a word. Besides, she was stunned.

She did not even feel used for a moment. It was her decision, she let him for this. Maybe she should not, since she saw the condition he was in, but something told her that it would let him forget for a while. She began to regret it. She did not want him to feel guilty about they were making love.

“I feel like I hurt you. If, after I have acted, you never want to share your bed with me again, I will understand. I deserved it,” he let go of her hand and gritted his teeth and jaw.

Astrid had not heard such nonsense in a long time. She shook her head, confused. She hoped that she had misheard, or that she was wrong. She had to talk him out of it.

She gripped his wrists firmly with both hands. She could not leave him now.

"Look at me," she ordered. "Now," she urged he when Hiccup tried to escape.

His eyes were sad and dark; they did not shine as usual; they were dim and tired. His face was tense, his eyebrows knotted. He looked threatening, as if he were afraid of himself.

“Hiccup, I came to you because you needed me. None of us planned it, but we should not regret it. We made love, it is a fact, but no one hurt anyone. Where did this idea come from?” she asked him a question but did not wait for an answer. “You didn't do anything yesterday to hurt me, really. It was different than usual,” she hesitated. She wanted to believe that nothing bad happened.” I’ve no regrets it. We were fine, just for a few moments. I stayed with you because I love you and because I am worried about you. You did not use me, I agreed to everything and I do not regret a second of our rapprochement.”

He listened to her words, even though it was hard for him to concentrate on what she was saying to him. His guilt had not diminished at all, and he was not entirely sure Astrid was being honest. Or was she just lying to calm him down?

He shook his head, chasing away the weird thoughts. He looked at her.

Astrid was trembling slightly with cold and emotion. He had not scared her that much in a long time. Hiccup was sharp and primitive, especially to her. She was afraid he was crazy. She remembered that night very clearly; this rapprochement was full of pain and suffering. The amount of tears they shed yesterday was enormous. Too much misfortune and injustice befell them so early and so violently.

“Let's not go back to that,” he whispered, looked to the wooden floor. He didn't want to argue with her; he preferred to finish the topic and forget about this. 

The blonde slid her hand over his, lacing their fingers together. She was not convinced by her fiancé’s idea. She knew he was unnecessarily blaming himself. She was sad to see him running away from her gaze as his eyes darken and fade more. Maybe it was too early to talk about any of these irritating problems. She had to give him time. 

_New wounds must heal._

She will be with him, no matter what happened. She will not leave him. Not now that he needs more love and support so desperately.

_Tragedies bring people together._

“Okay,” she replied calmly, hoping they will talk honestly about this situation in a while.

Hiccup looked at her hand and squeezed it gently. He ran his thumb over her wrist and the back of her hand. He pulled his beloved to him and pressed her to his chest. Astrid was covered only with a blanket. He put his arm around her and kissed the top of her head.

She heard the calm beating of his broken heart. She placed her hand on his chest and soaked the warmth of her lover. She closed her eyes and listened for his breath. Hiccups kissed her hair, relishing it sweet and soft.

They stood in silence; there was nobody and nothing around them but themselves. The closeness was soothing. When he had Astrid with him, everything became easier, brighter, and simpler. He wanted her presence to help him weather the blizzard of darkness and pain. The real challenge was just ahead of him. They stood and pretended everything was like a few days ago; how then when we help ourselves on such lazy mornings; like when they could hug each other for hours and not worry about anything.

“Get dressed. We must go to the Great Hall, eat something, and start dealing with this mess,” he pushed her away from him. He did not want to come back to reality; he did not want to leave the house. He was not ready to face this task. Was he responsible enough to replace his father?

Astrid nodded. The young man was about to start to leave when he felt his fiancée grasp his wrist again. He looked at her questioningly.

"Hiccup." She put a hand on his cheek; she looked deep into his eyes. “Remember that I am with you and you can always count on me. I am for you. I am not leaving you with this. We will manage. You are not alone with this,” she assured him. “I love you very much.”

She stood on her tiptoes and kissed him on the lips. Hiccup was a little tense. They had not kissed since yesterday, and I was not sure if he could still do it. It was the first move she made, though, so he pulled her close and kissed her harder.

That was her answer; a sweet, tender kiss full of love. He also apologized to her with this, promising himself he would never hurt her again, as he did yesterday. He would never treat her that way again. Astrid Hofferson deserves the best. She was his lady, not an object or a toy.

He kissed her calmly because who knows when another kiss will be.

***

“I never thought I'd see a Berk like this one day.”

Valka and the Gobber were standing at the entrance to the Great Hall. They watched the destroyed island, and dragons and people who live in harmony. The woman smiled gently. She dreamed her whole life about this: Vikings stopped killing innocent dragons. When she left this island, she felt it was going well; she was unable to convince her husband to stop the eternal war. The dragons took pity on her; they took her from a place where all her moral principles were broken. Valka suffered because she had left her family - her beloved husband and son. She also stopped believing that anything had ever changed.

Dreams came true when she met a young dragon rider - her only son. Valka was unable to hold back tears of emotion and shocked when she was told that dragons and humans lived in harmony. Was it a dream? Perhaps. However, after a while it turned into a nightmare. What she regained - was lost. The love of her life, best friend, and husband, sacrificed himself for the sake of their child.

Now, when she saw the kids playing with dragons and the Vikings flying on their backs, she felt her heart breaking. How can she stopped believing that things can change for the better? How could she run away from her husband and family? The woman sniffed and hugged herself.

She felt Gobber put a hand on her back.

“I didn't think you'd be here again, Val. I am glad that you are with us. You will come in handy. It makes no sense to cry over spilled milk now. Time will not stand still, despite such a huge tragedy that befell us all,” he hunched slightly; the loss of a longtime friend was extremely hard for him. He tried with all his might to be strong.

“He's so young. It is too early for him,” she shook her head. The thought of a twenty-year-old son who had to take over as chief terrified her.

“Take it easy. Hiccup is a smart boy,” said Gobber. “Believe me, he is fit for the role of a leader like no one else. Stoick raised him well. We just need to help him a little and give him some support,” he sighed. “It is good that he's got his mother back. You do not even realize how important it is to him.”

Valka looked at her companion. He was grief-stricken; his face looked tired and filled with pain. Each of them took time to get used to what they got from life.

Suddenly, Night Fury landed just below the Great Hall. Hiccup jumped off his friend's back and patted his nose to thank him for the flight. He adjusted his vest and turned to face mother.

Valka tensed, fixing a worried look at her son. She had not seen him since yesterday and did not really know how he felt. As far as she knew, Astrid was with him - his fiancée. It is good that he did not spend the most difficult night alone.

“Hiccup,” she waved shyly at him. The boy nodded back at her. His expression was severe. He was dark circles under his eyes and his hair was torn by the wind.

He climbed the stairs and stood in front of them. Toothless faithfully trotted at his side.

“We need a conference. The sooner we discuss certain issues, the better,” he spoke firmly; now he was a leader, responsible for the life of the Vikings.

“Of course.” Gobber put a hand on his shoulder; Valka watched her son silently. “The day has just started; people need eat something and wake up well. Even the dragons are tired after yesterday,” he suggested.

“Call a conference, immediately,” he answered him dispassionately, looked deep into the Viking's eyes. He tore his hand off his shoulder and silently entered the Great Hall.

Toothless purred worriedly. He looked apologetically at Valka and followed his rider.

The woman became stunned, she did not expect such a firmness on his part. Despite the coldness, the boy was right. The sooner they put their island in order, the better.

“I will convene the Council of Elders. On my way I will look for Astrid, she will gather riders and team A. You go to him,” Gobber pointed at the entrance to the building. “Talk to him about the conference, find out what he going to.”

Valka shook her head in agreement. She was determined to support her child in this difficult, crisis moment.

***

Hiccup stared at the throne on which his father sat a few days ago. Now this place was empty. For he, it seemed even more uncomfortable than usual. He did not want to sit there; he was not even going to try it. He sighed, fatigue sweeping through him.

Night Fury approached her master, showing her support. The dragon sensed his sadness, despondency, and sense of hopelessness. He felt guilty about it; after all, it was from his shot where Stoick died.

“You don't have to act so fast. People will understand if you want to wait with it all. Nobody is asking you to sit in that chair yet,” Valka's calm voice echoed from the side of the edifice. Toothless was running towards her, clearly pleased with her company.

“I have to attend to,” he replied, still staring at the throne.

“I don't know if you know, but hardly any chief likes to sit idly on this throne. Especially on something so uncomfortable,” she pointed to the throne. 

“Dad hated the days he had to sit here from morning to night. Sometimes I accompanied him. And I did not like it either,” he shrugged. His voice was dripping with sadness; involuntarily he remembered his father's irritation when he had to listen to the complaints of his people.

“Son,” she started; she could see that he was in bad shape.

“No,” he said, and clenched his fists. “I can't fall apart right now. There is no time for this,” he replied, giving his mother a cold look.

Valka sighed in despair. The door to the Hall swung open, letting a Vikings in.

“Glad you are here,” Hiccup shouted at the crowd. He rolled up his shirt sleeves and walked over to Eret, reaching out to say hello to him. He ran his eyes over the other faces; all those he asked for came.  
For a long moment he focused his gaze on Astrid, who was watching him with concern in her blue eyes. The girl's cheeks and nose were pink from the frosty air, and her braid was half blown by the wind. She looked natural and cute.

“Unfortunately, we didn't get the twins. They must still sleep,” Astrid said.

“It's okay, we can do without them,” said Hiccup, pointing to the table and the empty chairs. “Let's sit down.”

Astrid sat down opposite her fiancé; all members of the team A fees sat next to her. Eret and Valka were next to Hiccup.

“I hope you got some sleep,” the chief began, focusing his gaze on Astrid. The girl shifted slightly confused. “We have a hard day ahead,” he spoke looking around the group. “Perhaps a few days, maybe weeks. We must work, that our village were in order. Each of you will get a separate task. The dragons help will be indispensable, which luckily is no longer a problem, is it, bud?” He looked at the Night Fury, who was dozing by one of the pillars. Toothless purred in response; now, as alpha, he had control over dragons and their actions.

“First of all,” Hiccup continued; he opened his notes and began reading. “Astrid together with the A team: you will collect materials needed to rebuild houses and granaries. Collect all the material at the forge,” he focused his eyes on Astrid, who nodded her head to show that she understood. “Gobber and Fishlegs: you two will estimate the losses. Please, write them down somewhere, I would know what it looks like in numbers. Snoulout,” he turned to Jorgenson. “Together with the twins, try to recover as much material as possible. Moms make sure they have done their work good.”

“Are you suggesting something?” Snotlout was indignant. He rose abruptly from his seat and slapped his open hands on the table.

Hiccup sat, unfazed by his behavior. He looked at him, barely taking his eyes off his notebook.

“Maybe,” he growled. “But it is a lot of work, and you'll need someone to control it. If you want to undermine control and be of no use to anything, then just get out of here.”

There was a deathly silence in the Hall. Toothless raised his head and listened with interest. Hiccup sat up straight and shot Jorgenson a sharp look. Snotlout softened and sat up, resigned. There was no point in argue.

“Anyone else have any problems?” he asked the crowd. He turns over the next page with notes. He did not get any answer. “No one? Great.”

Valka put a hand on Hiccup's shoulder; the boy leaned towards her. The woman whispered something in his ear, to which he nodded and frowned in concentration. Astrid watched his every move with a hint of unease.

“Oh yeah,” he began quickly. “Eret,” he looked at the former hunter. “You will accompany me today. We will have to be everywhere. I want you to get to know the island and its inhabitants. Since you are one of us, you deserve it,” he closed his notes and rose from his seat. “Gather people to help. Everyone is to be involved. I will not be able to stand over you and was crucial every now and then; I trust all of you and I know that you will function efficiently. Let us meet at the Great Hall for dinner. Eat a decent breakfast and go to work,” he urged the audience, who started to get up from their seats. Astrid stopped and grasped the back of the chair. “Eret, you're coming with me. Time to fly a little.”

Hiccup nodded to Toothless, who perked up considerably. The thought of a joint flight with his human friend always has that effected on him. People started to leave the space. It was a surprisingly strange gathering - their leader was giving orders; admittedly right and thoughtful. Nobody dared to interrupt his spoke.

“Hiccup?” Astrid walked over to him. The young man turned slightly to her.

“I'll be right there,” he said to Eret, suggesting that he walked out of space. “What’s up?”

“Nothing,” she smiled shyly. “I just wanted to know how you feel.”

“It's okay, really,” he extended his hand to her, lovingly stroking her beloved's cheek. “And you?” he asked with concern in his voice.

“I'm fine too, I told you already,” she assured him again today. She grabbed his hand; they exchanged short, loving looks.

I've hope, he will be fine, she thought.

“I'll see you tonight,” he pulled her to him quickly to say goodbye.

Astrid stood at the table staring at the receding figure of the boy. The task assigned by the Hiccup motivated her to act. After all, at least part of their ruined world needs to be put in order.

***

For the Hooligans, work was more than a chore. It was a lifesaver for them. They were united oneself in the hardships of life. They were a close-knit community; people worked in harmony with each other. Additionally, they collaborated with dragons. It was the perfect view.

The damage was more than they expected. Fishlegs noted all important information with great concentration. Gobber worked in the smithy with the sweat of his brow.

Astrid and team A were efficiently collecting any materials that disappeared in the blink of an eye when the Vikings took them to start construction. From time to time, she noticed Hiccup and Eret soar across the sky on dragons. The blonde felt his support and presence and was extremely proud of him that she oversees every job.

The twins and Snoutlout were bringing large amounts of intact wood, materials, furniture, and other parts with their dragons to the place Valka had shown them. She watched each thing separately, assessing whether it could still to be used.

“Your people are a bloody well-coordinated tribe,” Eret shouted admiringly. Hiccup smiled sadly.

“My father made sure of it. As far as the entire Haddock family was concerned, they lived in harmony here,” he explained to him. They were high in the clouds and they had to shout to each other. Hiccup shifted his dragon friend's aileron. “We'll give him a test, huh?”

Toothless purred and flapped his wings, rising rapidly even higher. Eret was a bit confused, not knowing how to overrun. He had hunted dragons for years, but never was flying one. Fortunately, the Skullcrusher discovered the young chief's intentions himself, and flew after the Night Fury.

Hiccup stopped the dragon and looked at the stunned Eret. They were almost floating in the clouds. They have hence the perfect view of Berk. The glacier appearance created by the former alpha from this location was spectacular.

“Amazing,” the hunter whispered. “Wonderful views.”

“That's why I love to fly. I feel free, detached from all these mundane matters,” said quickly Hiccup.

“Listen, I-,” Eret began, looking shyly at his new friend. Hiccup watched the island. “I'm really sorry. If only I knew…” he shook his head.

“No one could have foreseen this,” he replied. “I can't turn back time. Let us be glad that our house and its inhabitants are already safe.”

“Our house?” the brunet became interested.

“Welcome to Berk, officially now,” he smiled at the companion. “But remember. If you betray us, I will not hesitate to throw you out in the middle of the ocean,” he threatened.

Eret looked down, laughing out loud.

“No one has ever shown me as much kindness as you. Thank you, Hiccup Haddock. It is an honor to join your people,” he said appreciatively.

_Your people._

Hiccup now had no way out; he had people under him he had to care for. He promised himself that he would do anything to be a good chief.

“I have more to show you,” he waved at Eret. “Berk has many secrets,” he assured him.

The dragons flapped their wings and took their riders towards the island that was reborn again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, translating this story is quite difficult and time-consuming for me. I have a specific writing style, in my native language I use many words, characteristic phrases and metaphors. I hope you can read it without any major problems.
> 
> Second - this story doesn't have a lot of action. It's all about emotions, and I can assure you that the story will take off. This story is difficult and extremely important to me. Seriously.
> 
> Thirdly - I will be grateful for any hints, opinions and comments regarding grammar or other comments regarding the correctness of writing descriptions, dialogues. I'm still learning and I really want to get better at it.
> 
> Thanks for reading this chapter, the next one is coming soon :)

**Author's Note:**

> **AN: So here we go! Let's get the party started, oh God...**
> 
> I look forward to your comments :) Take care!


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